Black in Asia

Defining my position

Man cannot remake himself without suffering, for he is both the marble and the sculptor.  ~Dr. Alexis Carrel

你好!欢迎你来看我的博客!叫我丹尼尔吧
Hello, welcome to my blog, my name is Daniel

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When I think about the above quote, I can’t help but feel that it defines my current situation. I’m rather stuck in between, trying to find myself. In between Asian culture and American culture that is….as weird as it sounds. I’ve often spoke to other international students both in America and China, one thing can be said, going international is both exciting and lonely. One one hand, we make friends all over the world, one the other hand, we are truly lonely. Lonely in the sense, that we can’t bring everyone with us on that journey; voyage if you will, and the inevitable return that leads to reverse-culture shock when it takes everything you got to convince others of what’s out there.

From my experience, I’ve been to China twice, and I’ve always heard, “God works in 3’s,” which means the blessings I receive, the things I experience, truth be told it’s usually in 3’s. So my third time to China will be spectacular id imagine. But unlike my first two times, I find myself truly confused in this point in time, I often speak with international students here, who have came back, and I help them with their loneliness and help them get over their reverse-culture shock, but it seems impossible to get over my own.

As a young man stuck in betweenyea, this is my crossroads I feel, because I can’t fully find true friends at my school, nor can I find those in the Chinese communities at other schools. Pride also kicks in here, for us international students, it’s true to say, we comeback with a big head, so I feel as why do I have to seek out others, when I’ve seen the world, or an exciting piece of it at least.

Another woe of us international student, is were usually seen as too energetic, to borderline annoying. This one is fact! I spoke with many of my international friends here at Lincoln, and to others, were overly energetic, always want to talk about international things, to people who are close-minded. And to my personal case, when Lincoln people don’t want to hear it, the Chinese community often already experienced it so it’s nothing new, which gives me a big, ohhhh yeah.

Man cannot remake himself without suffering, for he is both the marble and the sculptor.  ~Dr. Alexis Carrel. America gave me the marble, and China is my sculptor, I’m trying to make a fine piece of art, but it’s damn hard. This point of time is lonely, where it feels like true friends are few, the ones abroad seem life lasting, but at some point most of them go home, and that’s that. I guess this loneliness goes away over time, it’s all a part of maturing….or so I’ve heard.

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4 replies »

  1. When you say the things you say within this blog it strikes cords with many who have had life changing experiences abroad. There is balance to everything I have to hope because, especially going to the same school as you, I struggle with the same dilemma. God will continue you bless you, that’s what I hope. I think guys like us have to stay vigilante in our passions to progress

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    • Thanks for the comment, the thing I’ve learned about passions is that once it’s found, you want to apply that passion to anything and everything. To me, the articles flow because it’s how I feel, I didn’t have to try overly heard I merely brought out what I felt. And yes, I’ve found that merely every study abroad student faces the dilemma, especially at the Gilman networking event I went to in NY. Things are changing fast.

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